EFL Pronunciation Practice by use of Limericks

On many occasions I've been asked by teachers and students to recommend materials for pronunciation practice. I've rather despised most of the feeble sentences I've seen offered in textbooks for such purposes which packed in a large number of words containing a particular sound but were completely boring and silly, like the ghastly "rain in Spain falls mainly in the plain".

Some books have offered as such materials light verses or nursery rhymes but the latter especially have very often the disadvantage of incorporating archaic or other unusual words, senses or grammatical features or requiring abnormal pronunciations to make them rhyme or scan.

The reading well of serious verse is an extremely difficult thing to achieve as witness the very few even very highly educated native speakers of English who can manage to do so with success. It is notorious that the authors of much respected verse very often read aloud their own work quite badly.

Very few EFL students should ever be encouraged to attempt to read aloud serious verse. On the other hand non-serious verse which has been written with the sort of excessive rhythmic regularity which thereby makes it bad as poetry can, I believe, be put to good use for the encouragement of those who might benefit from practising material which embodies English typical conversational rhythms.

With this in mind I produced numbers of limericks for rhythm practice including a dozen or so which can be used to focus at the same time on certain vowel contrasts that many EFL learners need to cultivate. I shall give some of them below after a brief note on the limerick form.

A limerick consists of a five-line stanza with, in all, thirteen stresses. The first two lines constitute a rhyming couplet with three stresses in each of its lines. The two lines which follow it are also a rhyming couplet but with only two stresses in each. The final clinching line matches the first in number of stresses and also rhymes with it. The rhyme scheme is thus aa bb a.

The best examples of the form may additionally incorporate further internal rhymes but these are not necessary defining features. The typical content of a limerick is a potted story about a person who is indicated at the beginning of its first line and usually accorded a geographical attribution at the end of that line. Some limericks may incorporate puns and many have tended to be at least slightly improper as, you are cautioned, will be evidenced below.

Some limericks for pronunciation practice:

Note that in the following first 13 limericks a first vowel-type occurs as at least every stressed vowel in the longer lines viz numbers 1, 2 and 5, and that at least every stressed vowel in the shorter lines viz numbers 3 and 4 is a similar vowel often confused with it by EFL learners. The seven remaining ones are offered for rhythm practice alone.

1) Vowel of see versus that of sit


A teacher called Steven from Leeds
Eats each meal with a teaspoon of seeds.
Lilies cling to his skin,
Thickets spring from his chin,
And his knees are in leaf with green weeds.
cartoon image of man with plants growing from himself

2) Vowel of ash versus that of bed


That mad actor, Max Hackney-Pratts
Gathered masses and masses of hats,
Kept a set in his bed,
Twenty-seven on his head
And the balance on black plastic mats.

3) Vowel of ash versus that of bed


That fat black cat Nat from Rabat
Sat passively flat on his mat.
He never got wet
Except for a bet
And it had to be massive at that.

4) Vowel of hot versus that of saw


Sonia Hotckiss-Knotts
Makes constant blots and spots.
As she ought, of course
She feels awful remorse
But she'll obviously make blots till she rots.

5) Vowel of too versus that of foot


A foodie called Judy MacBruce
Found a use for the juice from a goose.
She took a good look
At a cookery book
And produced a quite beautiful goose mousse.

6) Vowel of too versus that of foot


A foolish group tutor called Jude
When rebuked for being stupidly rude
Said "I could - p'r'aps I should -
Be fulsomely good
But I'd sooner be brutishly crude".

7) Vowel of cup versus that of ash


A young girl called Buttercup Rust
With a stunningly up-thrusting bust
Rendered masses of chaps
Quite apt to collapse
Overcome with ungovernable lust.

8) Vowel of burn versus that of hair


Said a perky old nursemaid from Durban,
Though I'm certainly firmly suburban,
Yet I wear round my hair
— People stare, I don't care —
These pearls and this purple fur turban.

9) Vowel of sit versus that of see


A citizen of Hitchin called Binks
A little too given to drinks
Would eagerly greet
Folk he'd meet in the street
With sniggers and giggles and winks.

10) Vowel of ash versus that of bed


A laddie named Nash from Saltash
Was fantastic'ly rash with his cash
He lent and he spent
So it very soon went
And wham, in a flash came the crash.

11) Vowel of bed versus that of sit


Benjamin Gregory Berry
Never drinks red wine or sherry
But giving him whisky
Is a little bit risky:
He tends to get terribly merry!

12) Vowel of arm versus that of cup


Her aunt and her father and Barbara
Were ardently partial to Scarborough
But her uncle and mother
And cousins and brother
Would rather by far Market Harborough.

13) Vowel of hot versus that of saw


A hot-blooded novice at John's
Was erotic'ly fondling the swans
When "Make sport with my daughter"
Said a hoary old porter
"But the swans are not on - they're the dons'."

14)


A glutt'nous old chap from Madrid
Would eat masses and masses of kid
He "rammed" down his throat
Such amounts of young goat
That folk said that he'd choke — and he did.

15)


An EFL teacher in Asturias
Claimed qualifications that were spurious.
But I say what the hell
He taught perfectly well
And his lessons were no way injurious.

16)


An amorous couple in Spain
Set about making love on a train
But their pleasure was marred
Coz a tiresome guard,
When they wouldn't refrain, pulled the chain.

17)


The impulse to rhyme should not please
It's never a breeze or a wheeze.
In fact it's quite plain
That it causes much pain.
It's really a dreadful disease!

18)


A limerick writer one day
Confessed he was oft led astray:
"I prefer my verse clean
But the rhymes come obscene
And elbow the clean lines away".

19)


When it comes to my verse writing crimes,
Well, it's limericks I do the most times:
They soon come to an end
And their subjects depend
On the stocks of available rhymes.

20)


A fellow called Denis of Venice
Would refuse girls' requests to play tennis
But their suggesting the Lido
Would rouse his libido
And make Venice Denis a menace.

1)

 /ə 'tiːʧə kɔːld  'stiːvn frm ˏliːdz
iːts iːʧ 'miːl wɪð ə 'tiːspuːn əv ˎsiːdz
'lɪliz ˎklɪŋ tu ɪz ˏskɪn
'θɪkɪts ˎsprɪŋ frəm ɪz ˏʧɪn
ən ɪz ˋˏniːz │ər ɪn 'liːf wɪð 'griːn ˎwiːdz./

2)

/ðӕt 'mӕd ˎӕktə 'mӕks ˎhӕkni ˏprӕts
gӕðəd 'mӕsɪz ən 'mӕsɪz əv ˎhӕts
kept ə ˋset ɪn ɪz ˏbed
twenti ˋsevn ɒn ɪz ˏhed
ӕn ðə ˋˏbӕləns │ɒn 'blӕk 'plæstɪk ˎmæts./

3)

/ðæt 'fæt 'blæk 'kæt  ˎˏnæt │frm rəˋˏbæt
sæt 'pæsɪvli 'flæt ɒn ɪz ˎmæt
hi ˋnevə gɒt ˏwet
ˋekˎsep fər əˏbet
`ænd ɪt `hæd tə bi ˋˏmæsɪv │ət ˋðæt./

4)

/ 'sɒniə 'hɒʧkɪs ˏnɒts
meɪks 'kɒnstənt 'blɒts  n ˎspɒts
əʒ ʃi `ɔːt əv ˏkɔːs
ʃi fiːlz  ˋɔːfl rəˋmɔːs
bət ʃil `ɒbvjəsli meɪk 'blɒts tɪl ʃi ˎrɒts./

5)

ə `fuːdi kɔːld  'ʤuːdi məkˏbruːs
faʊnd ə 'juːs fə ðə 'ʤuːs frəm ə ˎguːs
ʃi 'tʊk ə gʊd ˎlʊk
ət ə ˋkʊkəri ˏbʊk
ən prə'djuːstᛁkwaɪt ə `bjuːtəfl guːs ˎmuːs./

6)

/ə 'fuːlɪʃ gruːp ˎtjuːtə kɔːld ˏʤuːd
wen rɪ`bjuːkt fə biːŋ `stjuːpɪdli ˋˏruːd
sed aɪ ˋˏkʊd – præps  aɪ `ʃʊd –
bi 'fʊlsəmli `gʊd
bət aɪd `ˏsuːnə bi ˋˏbruːtɪʃli ˋkruːd /

(7)

/ə 'jʌŋ 'gɜːl kɔːld ˋbʌtəkʌp ˋˏ rʌst
wɪð ə `stʌnɪŋli ˋʌpθrʌstɪŋ ˋˏbʌst
rendəd ˋmæsɪz əv ˏʧæps
kwaɪt 'æpt tə  kəˋlæps
əʊvəˋˏkʌm │wɪð ʌŋˋˏgʌvnəbl lˎʌst./

(8)

/sed ə `pɜːki əʊld `nɜːsmeɪd frm ˋˏdɜːbən
ðəʊ aɪm `sɜːtnli `fɜːmli səˋˏbɜːbən
jet aɪ `weə raʊnd maɪ `ˏheə
– piːpl `steər aɪ dəʊnt `ˏkeə –
ðiːz `ˏpɜːlz │ən ðɪs 'pɜːpl  fɜː ˋtɜːbən./

(9)

ə 'sɪtɪzn əv ˋhɪʧɪn `kɔːld ˋˏbɪŋks
ə 'lɪtl tuː 'gɪvn tə ˋˏdrɪŋks
wʊd 'iːgəli ˎgriːt
fəʊk hiːd `miːt ɪn  ðə ˋˏstriːt
wɪð ˋˏsnɪgəz ən ˋˏgɪglz ən `wɪŋks./

(10)

ə 'lædi neɪmd  `næʃ frm sɒltˋˏæʃ
wz fæn`tæstɪkli ˋˏræʃ│wɪð ɪz  `kæʃ
hi `lent ən i `spent
səʊ ɪt `veri suːn ˋˏwent
ən `wæm! ɪn ə ˋˏflæʃ │keɪm ðə `kræʃ./

(11)

'benʤəmɪn  'gregəri  ˏberi
'nevə drɪŋks red ˋˏwaɪn  ˈɔː ˎʃeri
bət ˋgɪvɪŋ ɪm ˋˏwɪski
ɪz ə 'lɪtl bɪt ˋrɪski
hi ˋˏtendz │tə get ˋˏterəbli `meri./

(12)

hər ˋɑːnt│ən ɜː ˋˏfɑːðər ən ˋˏbɑːbrə
wər ˋˏɑːdntli `ˏpɑːʃl tə `skɑːbrə
bət ɜːr ˋʌŋkl ən ˋˏmʌðə
ən `kʌznz n ˋˏbrʌðə
wʊd `rɑːðə baɪ ˋˏfɑː│mɑːkɪt `hɑːbrə./

(13)

ə `hɒtblʌdɪd `nɒvɪs ət ˋˏʤɒnz
wəz ɪˋˏrɒtɪkli ˋˏfɒndlɪŋ │ðə `swɒnz
wen "meɪk `spɔːt wɪð maɪ ˋˏdɔː tə"
sed ə hɔːri əʊld ˏpɔːtə
"bət ðə ˋˏswɒnz ə nɒt ˋ ɒn –  ðeə ðə `dɒnz."/

(14)

ə 'glʌtnəs əʊl  'ʧӕp frə məˋˏdrɪd
`wʊd ˏiːt 'mӕsɪz n ˏmӕsɪz əv ˋkɪd
hi `ræmd daʊn ɪz  ˏθrəʊt
sʌʧ ə`maʊnts əv jʌŋ ˏgəʊt
ðət ˈfəʊk sed id ˋʧəʊk ən i ˋdɪd./

(15)

ən 'iː ef el 'tiʧər ɪn  əˏstʊəriəs
kleɪmd 'kwɒləfɪˋˏkeɪʃnz │ðət wə `spjʊəriəs
bət ˋaɪ ˏseɪ│'wɒt ðə ˋhel
hi tɔːt ˋpɜːfɪkli  ˋˏwel
ən ɪz ˋˏlesnz │wə ˋˏnəʊ weɪ│ɪnˋˏʤʊəriəs./

(16)

ən ˈæmərəs 'kʌpl ɪn ˏspeɪn
'set əˏbaʊt 'meɪkɪŋ `lʌv ɒn ə ˋtreɪn
bət ðeə ˋpleʒə wz ˋˏmɑːd
kəz ə ˋtaɪəsm ˋˏgɑːd
wen ðeɪ `wʊdnt rɪˋˏfreɪn 'pʊld ðə `ʧeɪn./

(17)

ði 'ɪmpʌls tə ˋˏraɪm 'dʌznt ˋˏpliːz
ɪts ˋnevər ə briːz ɔːr ə  ˋˏwiːz
ɪn ˋfækt ɪts kwaɪt ˋˏpleɪn
ðət ɪt kɔːzɪz 'mʌʧ ˋpeɪn
ɪts ˋˏrɪəli ə 'dredfl dɪ`ziːz./

(18)

ə ˋlɪmərɪk ˏraɪtə │wʌn ˏdeɪ
knˋˏfest│hi wəz 'ɒft led əˋstreɪ
"aɪ prəˋˏfɜː maɪ vɜːs ˋkliːn
bət ðə ˋˏlaɪnz kʌm  əb`siːn
ən ˈelbəʊ ðə ˏkliːn laɪnz əˋweɪ"./

(19)

wen ɪt 'kʌmz tə maɪ ˋvɜːs raɪtɪŋ ˏkraɪmz
wel ɪts `lɪmrɪks aɪ duː ðə  məʊs ˏtaɪmz
ˋðeɪ suːn  kʌm tuː ən ˏend
æn ðeə sʌbʤɪkts dɪˋˏpend
ɒn ðə ˈstɒks əv əveɪləbl  ˋraɪmz./

(20)

ə 'feləʊ kɔːld ˎdenɪs əv ˋˏvenɪs
wʊd rɪ`fjuːz gɜːlz  rɪkwest tə pleɪ  ˋˏtenɪs
bət ðeə sə`ʤestɪŋ ðə ˋˏliːdəʊ
wəd  `raʊz ɪz lɪˋˏbiːdəʊ
ən ˋmeɪk venɪs ˋˏdenɪs ə ˋmenɪs./